A Page from My Journal

I keep thinking that in order to blog “properly” my entries need to be several paragraphs long. I have decided that I need to get over that.

I am not a consistent radio hog. My listening interests change periodically. Of course, as a teen I listened to pop and rock. As a young adult I started listening to Country, I don’t know why, actually. Eventually it evolved to News Radio. I listened to news radio religiously. That relationship began as a nightly tune-in for the wonderful old radio programs they used to run (they don’t do that anymore). I enjoyed hearing the mysteries and cowboy programs from the “olden days.” In the morning I would listen to the traffic alerts and became quite addicted to the ever evolving news. I remember being so swept into a particular story about a missing politician (I could take that all over the place!) that I was in tears on the freeway when they finally found him.

After meeting my husband I went back to listening to country. I still vacillated between news radio and country music for several years—I admit I was a Dr. Laura fan for a long time (until she was rude to me). Lately I have been listening to my kid’s music which is a combination of pop/hip-hop/rap and even country… My friend affectionately calls it CRAP.

Until recently.

I’ve started that private affair with news radio again. As soon as my kids get out of the car I tune it into the AM station that carries constant news, KNX, my favorite source for up to the minute news! I have to turn it up because I can’t hear very well and I don’t want to miss a word! If I hear of a motorcycle accident anywhere between Palmdale and Pacoima I’m on the phone with the husband to make sure he’s still alive and we won’t have any expensive repairs on the Harley! If I hear a funny or interesting story I’m on the phone with my Dad to share it with him (another news junkie, but more of “The Weather Channel” variety). I love the news and am figuring this relationship will always be a part of who I am.

So in addition to the news they occasionally have little blurbs from Charles Osgood, Katie Couric and others who express their opinions, Op-Ed pieces I think you “real” writers might call them. Katie Couric does this thing she calls “A Page from My Notebook” and it’s a short, maybe two paragraphs, blurb about something relevant and recent. The other day she did a commentary about Obama’s inauguration speech and his use of scripture. This made me realize that I do not have to write a full-on essay for my blog. I could keep it limited to one or two paragraphs! What a relief! So maybe you’ll see more of me because I don’t have to write so much.

Hey wait! This turned out to be several paragraphs after all. Dog-gone-it, and I was shooting for one or two!

Job Wanted!

Dear all you already employed people;

Please quit. I really need a job and as long as you are still employed it means that I am not. If you were to quit then I might actually have a chance at finding employment!
Of course if you are currently a doctor or lawyer then don’t quit because I don’t want those jobs. Also, if you collect trash or your job requires you to be outside climbing poles, or anything like that, then never mind. Oh, and while I’m at it, if your job requires you to climb ladders or be any higher off the ground then about three feet then forget it, keep your job, I don’t want it. Also if your job keeps you in a tiny confined space I don’t want that either.

Also, if you make really really important decisions about money then it might be better if I didn’t do that either. I don’t really want to be a manager over others or have anything to do with what some might call “stock” of any kind, including but not limited to commodities, merchandise or animals. Oh, and I also don’t do sales. I don’t want to sell property, or any other of the above-mentioned “stock.”

I also don’t really want to deal with kids. Kids are annoying and I have a few of my own that annoy me during my off time so I’m not really very interested in dealing with other people’s annoyances. That includes teaching, however, I am a teacher and can teach, and am relatively good at it, but I don’t want to deal with the parents of said kids and that’s part of teaching nowadays so, not interested.

And while I’m at it I don’t want to have to clean anything. Especially toilets. Toilets are disgusting especially after being used by above-mentioned kids, particularly boys. Nope, I don’t want anything to do with that! I also don’t want to clean anything in a kitchen including dishes, stoves or refrigerators. I don’t really want to cook either. I don’t mind eating, especially sweets, but I prefer them prepared by others.

I like books. Pretty much anything to do with books would work for me. I like to read books. I like to look at books. I like turning the pages. I like putting them on shelves. I like organizing them in alphabetical order by author, or by title. I also don’t mind inputting the data about the books. I don’t mind magazines either. They’re pretty and have nice pictures to look at, well, except for the naked people. I don’t want to deal with naked people.

I don’t mind typing either. Especially words. Typing words is fun and interesting. I prefer to type my own words but I don’t mind typing other people’s words usually. Unless they’re stupid. I don’t like typing words of stupid people. Or ignorant people. Or intolerant people. The only thing I can’t tolerate is intolerance.

So if you have any of the jobs that I have already mentioned I don’t want then never mind and be happy in your job, if you can. However, if your job requires you to sit on your butt most of the day looking at a computer screen then quit because I am really good at that and I might have a chance!

Head to Page

I am constantly having blogging ideas running in my head but *making* the time to actually create the post AND post it has been a bit of a challenge for me. I should have at least five more posts because that's how many I've made notes on. [insert eyerolling image here]
Maybe now that we'll be back on our normal routine of school and work I'll *make* more time to write? Hahahahaha... Okay, so the holidays are approaching and the *more time* fallacy is quite a joke, but still... I have goals. :)
So stay tuned... I'll get on the bandwagon yet!

Secrets

When other people have them they don't work for me. LOL But I have them. I don't have a lot and they mostly all occurred before my 18th birthday so why are they relevant now? I guess they are only relevant to my children. There are things about me I don't want them to know... yet. I think it's too much. Then again when I find out secrets about my mother I'm not too shocked, okay, well, maybe a little but I guess it depends on the secret.
Secrets that my kids have bother me. I understand that my teens think they have a "right" to privacy. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Okay, sorry, but I don't agree. I'm sure I thought that when I was a teen but I didn't have a cool parent like me. haha My girls are constantly telling me, "I can't tell you," and I hate it. I really hate it. I want to know everything. I want to know what they are doing, who they are talking to, who they like, who they don't like, who their friends like, etc. etc. Actually, I think it's important for me to know this stuff. How can I be a good parent if I don't know that the reason they want to go to XXX house is because YYY is going to be there and their life might end if it doesn't happen.
Last night I told Kimberly that she couldn't go to the Homecoming dance. She can't date so I thought, Why should she go? She started crying. Oh boy. So, of course, I changed my mind and we made arrangements for her to go. It was fine. It was benign (she told me she didn't even dance with any boys but stayed with her girlfriends all night). Okay, so what was the big deal. I guess the big deal is that I don't know what she's being exposed to. I don't know what kind of music they will play. I don't know what boys are going to "hit" on her and if she's open to that or not. And she doesn't tell me much. That makes me kind of sad.
Emily is the worst though. "I can't tell you," is almost a mantra of hers and makes me want to roll my eyes every time I hear it, oh, and SMACK her too! Of course you can tell me, I'm your MOMMY! Who else will listen and care? Well, all her friends listen and care. This morning she kept saying, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," to her friend and I wanted to know why. I wasn't told. "It's not my secret," she says, but even if it was she probably wouldn't tell me. Boo hoo.
I'm told I like to share secrets. What? Who me? I do not share stuff that I know is a secret but I admit to sharing stuff I know because I don't think it's a secret. My niece told me that people shouldn't have to tell me, "That's a secret!" I should know. Huh? I don't really keep secrets so I don't get it.
But that's not true either. I keep secrets about money I spend. I keep secrets about my friends, and sometimes my family (when they ask me to, of course). And, as mentioned before, I keep secrets of my past. I did tell my girls a story from my teens this morning when I was trying to ingratiate them to my way of thinking (that they should tell me everything) about when I snuck out to go to a party at the beach. When I got home my mother pried my mouth open to sniff it to see if I had anything to drink (I hadn't). I thought that was horrible. I still think that was horrible. I don't blame her in a way, but truthfully it wasn't me that did all that crap to make them not trust teens, it was my brothers. Then I did do stuff because they weren't trusting me anyway. They never let me do anything fun (like go to drunken beach parties!) which is why I let Kimberly go to the Homecoming dance. Because, really, she doesn't keep that many secrets from me. And I trust her.

Pain in the neck...

So the disintegrated vertebrae in my neck have really been bothering me lately. My mom made a comment to me recently about the kinds of jobs I could get and said something about working the stock room being bad for my back. I had to scratch my head a bit over that one because I forgot that I frequently suffer from severe sciatica. So in addition to my aching back I also have a pain in the neck. Those two things keep me from doing a lot of physical activity. I do worry about exascerbating either problem and have been know to avoid things because I am "afraid" and that can be annoying, at best.
I am considering going to the dr's and asking them to do the "surgery" that was recommended to me years ago when the disintegrated vertebrae were discovered, but I am afraid of that too. I love rollercoasters, but they kill me. I end up in bed for days. I love to walk, I've walked all over Europe and Asia, but I'm "afraid" to now because it worsens my lower back pain and I end up in bed for days.
As a mother of five children being in bed for days is not a good thing.
One day and the kitchen is over-run with dishes, crumbs, left-out (and now trash) food, miscellaneous papers, even clothing, shoes and towels end up all over my kitchen if I'm not out there to curb it or clean it up. So being down and out for even a day is not a good thing.
So I take a lot of aspirin. This helps curb the pain but does not remove it entirely. I don't know what living "pain free" means anymore. Many people, including myself, think that a lot of my problems would or could be solved if I lost weight. I suppose that's true about my back, and my knees, but not my neck. I don't think losing weight would re-integrate my vertebrae. I actually don't know what they do, that's part of the fear. Of course. The not knowing is always a fear.
The idea of being down and out kind of frightens me too. Who will do it all? If I can't, who will? I have no idea so that's a legitimate fear.
I also believe my whacked out hormones contribute to my pain. Menopause sucks, just in case you were wondering. The hot flashes are not fun. Just this week I was HOT but my feet were ice cubes, for three days! That is not something I enjoy. It's possible that if I lost weight my hormones wouldn't be so whacky, but there aren't any guarantees on that either, considering my age.
This week I did something to help rectify my weight issues and one of those was to buy two new DVDs for working out at home. Both of them are circuit training, which I love because I tend to get distracted easily and lose interest. What was I talking about...??? Oh right, exercising. The other thing I got was a trial of Acai Berry and a gastric bulking agent. I love experimenting with my body. BTW, so far nothing has worked and there is no miracle out there. Bummer, huh.
Today I want to write. I'd really like to be left alone but I don't think that's going to happen. I have two teen daughters that think it's my job to cart them around. I have three boys that tend to think the same thing. They either want to be taken somewhere (that inevitably costs money) or they want someone to be picked up, which means more work for me.
And more work for me is never good. It's a pain in my neck!