Once upon a time there lived a Beautiful Girl who did not know she was beautiful. She spent much of her time reading. She read in the morning, in the afternoon and sometimes all night long. She even read while in school when she was supposed to be learning fractions. Her mind was immersed in the fantasy of imagination and destiny. Oh, and she loved shoes.
In another part of the land lived a Grumpy Boy. He wasn’t always grumpy but deep inside he thought he was grumpy and every now and then his grumpiness would overcome him. He was a decent boy, a hard worker and a loving son. He wanted to do what was right, but being left-handed just made life difficult. He struggled to see the glass half full.
One day, inevitably, the Beautiful Girl and the Grumpy Boy were in the same place. They didn’t notice each other at first. After some time the Beautiful Girl started to feel beautiful and began to change. As she believed in her beauty she became even more beautiful. That is when the Grumpy Boy noticed her and asked her to paint her toenails. She did.
It wasn’t long (one date) at all before the Beautiful Girl and the Grumpy Boy fell in love and got married. And lived Happily Ever After.
My Dear Husband (DH) and I recently celebrated our 19th Anniversary. Not too much of a milestone considering both our parents have celebrated their 50th Anniversaries. I guess we have a lot to live up to. Coincidentally the next day we were watching a lecture given at BYU by a Marriage & Family Professor about how to have a successful marriage. He said the two key components were Repentance and Forgiveness. We just looked at each other and nodded. Oh yeah, we know about that!
While out to dinner the night before I made the comment, “It’s been quite the ride!” My DH agreed. Marriage is not easy. Despite what some moronic celebrities might think, marriage takes work. It requires compromise and compassion. After 19 years do I consider myself an expert? Not at all, I do however know that in order to keep our marriage “alive” we MUST recognize or OWN our mistakes, apologize sincerely for them and accept the apologies given. Of course, the ideal relationship would be where each partner knows ahead of time that the said behavior/reaction/comment would be hurtful/disturbing/annoying to the other and then have the maturity to avoid them. Um. Have they created the device yet that does that? Reads minds I mean. Or the pill that activates the unselfish gene? I have heard that selfishness and pride can destroy a marriage. Okay. Well that would be the opposite of Repentance and Forgiveness so that makes sense.
In case you haven’t figured it out I am the Beautiful Girl. DH is the Grumpy Boy and the HEA takes a lot more than shoes and learning to be ambidextrous. Beautiful Girl must learn to forgive Grumpy Boy for being grumpy and Grumpy Boy must learn to forgive Beautiful Girl for spending all the money on shoes and all her time reading books. The same things that may appeal to us may also make us crazy.