The Golden Rule Girl

My VBFF (Very Best Friend Forever—who has another nickname I won’t go into today) calls me “The Golden Rule Girl.” I love this, however, I have found that it tends to get me into trouble with those that expect something different. Ah, yes, that lovely word: Expectations. Not something I emphasize too much. I have them; for myself, for my children, of course… However, I don’t judge others based on mine. Well, maybe my children, and a little bit my husband, but certainly not those outside my immediate family. I don’t see the point. No, not even with my parents or siblings. They are who they are and that is no bearing on me. I cannot say for certain that that is reciprocal however.

What it means is that I treat others they way I expect them to treat me. The problem with this is that I have pretty low expectations of others therefore I can tick people off without realizing it. I can also be completely unaware of how my actions affect others. I really have no clue. I do not ever mean to offend but I am sure that I do and have. I am truly sorry if you have been a victim of my complete cluelessness, know that it is not done maliciously or even knowingly. I am just toodling around in my life hoping that other people are not bothered by my seeming indifference. Maybe I am indifferent, if so then it is because I really have no idea.

It also means that I speak my mind. The other missionaries I worked with used to call me “Sister Blunt.” I was not necessarily proud of this distinction, I just really did not know any other way to communicate. I was not and am not much of a flirt. I really do not understand the concept. Why would you not just tell people how you feel? This baffles me.

So if I have perchance, and probably so, offended you in some way, I am sorry. I probably have no idea I have done so. I may or may not have intentionally targeted you or yours. It was certainly not meant to harm, I am just trying to be myself. I am sorry if that offends you but chances are slim that I will change. I like being blunt. I like being straightforward. I like speaking my mind. I also like being unpredictable (read: undependable) but see the downfall to that. I hope this clears it all up for you.

Why Scouting? ...an LDS perspective.

As a parent I want to teach my children to have a strong character and unyielding values. I want to believe that when my job is done I can send my children out into the world confident that they can and will survive, no, can and will thrive! With the Boy Scout program boys can learn basic survival skills and self reliance in a fun group setting while setting and achieving goals, reaping rewards for and understanding the value of hard work and learning independence.          

Our youth are interested in having fun. Scouting should be presented in a way that they feel excited about what they are learning. The activities and skills learned should be geared toward interests and goals of the boys. Some boys feel that they are not “cut out” for Scouting, which means they have a limited understanding of what Boy Scouts has to offer. Maybe they just see the work and not the rewards, maybe their parents are unsupportive of the program or maybe they just lack guidance.

President Gordon B. Hinckley has stated: "I love the Scouting movement. If every boy in America knew and observed the Scout Oath, we would do away with most of the jails and prisons in this country. This program builds boys, builds their futures, leads them on the right path so they can make something of their lives.  Every man or woman who helps a boy along the road of life not only does a great thing for him but does a great thing for society as a whole." The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has embraced the Scouting program for the male youth in the church. Starting from age eight, boys are led in areas of personal growth, loyalty and basic skills. These activities should be reflective on every aspect of their lives. By living the Scout Oath and the Scout Law, each boy commits to being better at everything they attempt. With a pledge that includes “to do my duty” to traditional values, and constantly strive to do their best in worthy causes; a motto that encourages them to “Be Prepared” for whatever may come, and a slogan to “Do a good turn daily,” helps boys realize that they are part of a bigger whole.

In addition to basic survival skills, boys are taught how to be men of strong character. These young men are our future leaders, both political and religious. The Scout Law teaches the boys to be “Trustworthy, Loyal, Helpful, Friendly, Courteous, Kind, Obedient, Cheerful, Thrifty, Brave, Clean and Reverent.” These are qualities of social and spiritual leadership. Imagine how society would be if everyone, not just the Boy Scouts strived to live these values daily. Our futures would be secure and we could insure peace around the globe!

Lord Baden Powell, the founding father of the Boy Scouts, was a British military leader. A hero from the British Boer War, he trained boys and men in the skills of scouting for military purposes. Over the years he received letters from former trainees regarding all they had learned under his tutelage that affected their post-military lives in positive ways. Eventually he pondered the idea of training boys as “peacetime” scouts, “ready at all times to help others.”

He believed, “The training would have to be attractive and interesting. Here his own boyhood gave him a clue. He remembered the fun of boating and tramping with his brothers…and the eagerness with which…he had slipped away into the copse to watch animals and make fires and cook rabbits. To all this he could now add his own experiences as a practical pioneer and scout in the army.” (E. Reynolds, Oxford University Press, First printed in 1943.) From these ideas and principals, he began the process of building a training program for boys. He ran a successful camp session at Brownsea in 1907 and the Boy Scouts were officially created in 1910. The Boy Scouts of America were also founded in 1910 by William Boyce who brought some business organization to Baden-Powell’s ideas. Over the years the program has been modified and enhanced to reflect Lord Baden-Powell’s original purposes.

During his military service, R.S.S. Baden-Powell observed the cadet corps and took note of their courage and valor. This group of young, under-age, servants to the military made a positive impression on Lord Baden-Powell and was the beginning of the seed for establishing the Scouting program among the youth. He wrote several books including Aids to Scouting, a military training manual, which became a best-seller. From that he based his program ideas and rewrote the book with an aim toward the youth. He then wrote Scouting for Boys after the Brownsea camp experience and the concepts were adopted worldwide.

The ideas behind the values and principals in Scouting are based on self-discipline and survival skills for the military. The original concepts were conceived to create helpful, strong, physically, mentally and spiritually grounded youth, prepared to be whatever they chose and do what needed to be done under any circumstance. This training would provide leadership for the future and self-reliance to the masses.

One of the biggest purposes of Scouting is to cultivate self-sufficiency, confidence and learning by doing. The motto “Be Prepared” and slogan, “Do a good turn daily,” emphasize this sharing of knowledge and skill. The attitude that Scouts are trained to be helpful, courteous and kind also underscores the need for worldwide acceptance and tolerance necessary for peace. Being loyal, thrifty and brave stresses the need for courage and valor in times of emergency. A man who is trustworthy, friendly and thrifty will be successful in business and make a good employee. To be clean and obedient leads to reverence and spiritual power that is worthy of missionary service and temple marriage.

Some parents and youth are overwhelmed by the amount of work required to fulfill all the requirements for the highest Boy Scout honor of Eagle Scout. It is imperative that this process be an experience of growth. We have been counseled to “raise the bar” and in order to this we need to push ourselves and our youth beyond our comfort zones. We need to help them understand the importance of working hard for those things that are worthwhile and bring success to the future.

Charles W. Dahlquist II, General Young Men President, said, “(There is) majesty that can be part of the activity program of the Aaronic Priesthood, if we apply the principles that caused the Brethren, in 1913, to enter into a partnership with the Boy Scouts of America for the strengthening of the Aaronic Priesthood.  There was inspiration in that decision, as there is inspiration in the decision to continue that decision today. And there must be inspiration in applying the principles of Scouting to strengthen and vitalize the quorums of the Aaronic Priesthood and each young priesthood bearer today.” He also stated, “It is very evident that in those stakes and wards where Scouting is used to strengthen the priesthood, the young men of the Aaronic Priesthood are much stronger and better prepared than they would otherwise have been.”

President Dahlquist has said, “Scouting (is an effective resource) to help support the teachers and priests quorums of the Church raise the bar for these great young men of the Aaronic Priesthood by teaching them timeless values, giving them opportunities to learn and apply leadership skills and develop spiritually, physically, intellectually, emotionally, and socially---all in a fun and enjoyable setting, planned by the young men themselves, with appropriate adult supervision.” The emphasis should be on “a fun and enjoyable setting.” Although earning an Eagle honor should be hard work it should also be fun along the way.

One of the fundamental purposes of the Scouting program is to cultivate a love and appreciation for the outdoors and outdoor activities. However, not all scout activities are required to be outdoors as some young men are not interested in those kinds of events. There are experiences in business, engineering, sciences and the arts that should be emphasized as well. Essentially there are focuses for every type of boy in any circumstance. Each boy should be encouraged to participate in those activities he is interested in as well as those he may not find as enjoyable as this helps cultivate tolerance and acceptance of differences.

Another skill that is important for the youth to learn and understand is the ability to work as a team. Throughout adulthood they will be required to work with others on a variety of projects under a multitude of circumstances. The ability to work well with others is paramount to their success in business, family and personal pursuits. The Boy Scouting program develops this skill through troop participation. They learn the process of delegation and what happens when they, or others, fail to follow through on a commitment. They also learn to forgive and be understanding and tolerant when someone does not fulfill their commitments.

President Dahlquist further said, “The Church continues to follow the programs of the Boy Scouts of America to help its young men 12 to 18 years of age as they magnify their callings in the priesthood. Scouting helps young men develop desirable character traits, citizenship, and physical and mental fitness. The Scouting program teaches young men how to rely on themselves, serve and lead others, prepare for emergencies, conserve natural resources, and become actively involved in community, school, and Church service projects.”

The number of Eagle scouts among our nations’ leaders, both religious and political, is astounding. This list includes Gerald Ford, 38th President of the U.S., James Lovell – Astronaut, Steven Spielberg, Film Director/Producer, Walter Cronkite - Journalist, T.V. commentator, and many church leaders including Howard W. Hunter, 14^th President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. President Thomas S. Monson has said, “It is the mission of the Boy Scouts of America to serve others by helping to instill values in young people and, in other ways, to prepare them to make ethical choices over their lifetime in achieving their full potential.”

Even if a boy does not reach Eagle status, they will reap magnificent rewards for having participated and made an effort to learn, do and be what the Scouting program encourages. A parent will not be remiss for supporting their sons in this program. It is preparation for life; preparation for the future.

Poppies and Freeways

The other day I was driving home from a meeting in a town over an hour away and I had to take a bunch of freeways I wasn’t used to driving. I listen to the traffic news a lot so I’m familiar with the numbers and the names but not always sure which name goes with which number. In Los Angeles the freeways have names, like The Golden State, or The San Bernadino. The newscasters also refer to specific areas on the freeways, like the Orange Crush, and the East L.A. Interchange. I don’t always know where these places are because I don’t drive them.

Another point about the freeway system is that my “Eastern” friends, i.e.; anyone past Nevada, are always making fun of us Californians for saying “the” before a freeway number. Well, I discovered there is a reason for that, and I quote from Grant Geyer’s article in “American Speech.” 

“In about 1941, just before the completion of the first of the famous freeways, intercity traffic came into Los Angeles on the north-south axis on U.S. 99, U.S. 101, or California Route 1.... Before the freeways were built, locals generally preferred the old, time-honored street or road names instead of numbers in conversation. So for ‘U.S. 99’ they said San Fernando Road because the highway followed that particular named street, as far as the distant end of “town.” Likewise, ‘U.S. 101’ was Ventura Boulevard and ‘Route 1’ was Pacific Coast Highway....Route 1 or Route 101 was not used in town.
...
When the federal interstate system grew up, the southern California area got its share of funding and road numbers.... However, for the first 20 years of the interstate system, no one used the numerical designations.... The interstate routes around Los Angeles were called the Ventura Freeway, the Hollywood Freeway, the Santa Ana Freeway, the Golden State Freeway, the San Bernardino Freeway, the Pasadena Freeway, the Glendale Freeway, the San Diego Freeway, the Santa Monica Freeway, the Harbor Freeway, the Riverside Freeway, and the Long Beach Freeway.

....The strange-sounding usage of the plus number, as in the 118, was the natural result of an amazing proliferation of new, minor interstate cutovers, extensions, and bypasses that began about 1975.... [It] was even more pronounced when new major Los Angeles interstates sprang up without having any precursors and without being extensions of earlier, nonnumerical freeways. The first one I remember in this category was the 605 Freeway.” (“The” Freeway in Southern California, by Grant Geyer, American Speech, Summer 2001)

So, fancy that, a legitimate reason for our “funny” way of referring to the freeway system.

Along my drive I had to take “the” 10 West to “the” 57 North and right there at this colossal interchange (not the East L.A. interchange) there were wild poppies growing along the side of the road. It was beautiful! I was surprised by the cluster of nature that created a small haven of beauty on an urban freeway. It pleased me. Maybe I was already happy from having had a wonderful day and evening by myself (sans children and spouse) with little demands, or maybe it really was just an appreciation for an enigma among spoils.

 

Poppies, by the way, are one of my most favorite flowers. Maybe a true Californian at heart, but mostly their presence in late winter and early spring in the desert where I live signals new life and color in an otherwise drab environment. Unfortunately when the blooms disappear they look like messy weeds and their roots like pale carrots. While they bloom along roadsides, on the hillsides, and yes, apparently even along freeway interchanges, I am awestruck at their cheerfulness.

Accessories

I have recently, as in the last few years, discovered the joy of accessorizing. I fell in love with shoes first, then moved on to bags, handbags, backpacks, totes, etc. I am now a connoisseur of a variety of accessorizing and trying to get into the scarves thing but haven’t quite grasped it yet. That new look is so awesome but I’m just too hot to do it (and you can interpret that any way you like).

My favorite accessory has to be shoes. No matter what size I am my feet have stayed the same. If I was smart I would have kept those cute shoes and sandals I paid good money for in the 80’s because those funky boots and Cherokee sandals are back in style now. My shoulder-padded dresses are just too dated for my daughters to wear but I bet they’d get a kick out of my chunky, wooden-heeled leather boots I had!

I have a great collection of shoes which I try to pare down every now and again, but it’s so hard! Especially when you know, just know, it will be in style again. Unfortunately for me I don’t have my own “shoe and purse closet” so I have to make sacrifices now and then. In the last couple of years, however, I have just bought those crates and stacked them up in my closet and rotate them with the seasons. You know flip-flops for summer, flats for fall, boots for winter and sneakers for spring. It’s only logical. I have a fettish with ballet flats right now and just can’t get enough of them. I’m thinking about silver…

As far as bags go, well, I have one for every season, and then some. Since starting school again it’s been a necessity to have a backpack. I’ve been pretty good with that one as I usually just use the Breast Cancer backpack I bought at their site. It pretty much goes with anything I own because it’s in my basic colors; black and pink. If it isn’t pink, what’s the point?

My niece told me that she “allows” herself a purse budget and buys a new purse every month or so. I liked that idea and had my eye on a really nice red bag and was fortunate that I found one on sale at Target. Then I got a black bag via Mary Kay, very nice! And that one goes perfectly with my pink and black backpack. Right now I’m using the Hawaiian one I bought last year on my visit with my brother. I’m sure I’ll switch again soon, the weather is warming up.

My latest craze has been jewelry. I love earrings. I can’t leave the house without a pair of earrings on, I feel naked! I really need to keep a pair in the car for those days I leave in a hurry, i.e.; naked! I recently discovered Park Lane Jewels (thank you Leslie!) and have had the time of my life accessorizing with that stuff!!!

Hats? I don’t do hats. I look hideous in hats. Hats are my bane. Bandanna’s however I find very fun.

Really, when you’re chubby, like me, it’s good to know how to accessorize efficiently. It helps when you’re skinny too. Accessorizing can be loads of fun no matter what your size, or even species for that matter!

Media

I have been considering adding reviews to my blog, well, just because. I have opinions and I like to share them. My favorite part about being an English major is when we get to sit around in class and bash…I mean discuss an author’s work.

I love to read and am always reading something. Sometimes it is a book for school but more often than not it’s just something I picked up. I have favorite authors and favorite genres but I don’t limit myself by that at all. I tend to read almost everything I can clap my eyes on, from cereal box backs to billboards, to the instructions that come with just about everything (those can be rather humorous if they’ve been translated from another language).

Movies and television are also something that easily amuses me. I have yet to figure out where this comes from but I have noted that most of my siblings are the same way. As a matter of fact, when the television is on it tends to lure us in like a siren song. My dad has always been notorious for walking in at the worst part, however. If a movie had a nude scene or bad language, that’s when he entered the room.

I’m not particularly high-brow either. Sorry to disappoint, but my tastes run rather broad. My most important goal in media is entertainment. If I’m not entertained then it won’t hold my interest. Um, and I’m pretty easily entertained.

I also enjoy media that is informative, instructive and profound. I love putting down a book or walking out of a movie with a “smack my forehead” experience! This is when you know you have been ignorant or sheltered and someone has hit that cord. I’m not necessarily talking about a “history lesson” as most of those are incorrect (I’ve found) but about lessons about human emotions and relations. Those are amazing to watch, when done correctly.
Picking apart why something strikes me is one of my favorite things to do, so welcome to my media autopsy.